skel said:
...winter can do that to a man.
I hear that. Every fall, like clockwork, I get all nostalgic about the days when shit wasn't so real...
It's not MY death that scares me. Perhaps, it scares me a little but it ultimately pales in comparison to the fear I get when I think about my family getting older...also being married with no intention to have children is something that makes me worry for my wife in the event of my demise...
I watched my Mom and Aunt take care of my grandfather while alzheimer's totally erased him and that was some heavy heavy shit. I don't know how I'm going to cope with that; if needed.
My father is a disabled vet (legs blown off in 'nam) and he lives alone. I see him as much as I can but not enough. Alzheimer's and cancer run deep on his side of the family. I'm also fairly certain he's being cat fished by someone but thats a whole different bag of shit.
Oddly enough, I can feel better when I just tell myself "literally everyone in the history of forever has had to deal with this so stop thinking your situation is special and just be ready for life when it kicks you in the dick".
EDIT: Also living in the present helps big time. If you spend time worrying about inevitable stuff on the horizon you neglect to notice things aren't half bad in the here and now.