Letters to things and people

I love your avatar btw

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i know, i'm wondering though, can an admin/mod put some kinda funny name under my forum name...like 'Dickhead' or 'Gaylord' or something just as funny?..
 
Dear Work,

Why must I miss you? Who really misses their job? I know I only have a week or so until things are back to normal, but I need to get back to your fun once again. Plz think about another raise soon. Thx,

DOR



Dear Ribs,

It been a week and a half and you still hurt. Today on the street car I didn???t mean to stretch in such a way, as to cause you pain. The drugs I???m taking to heal you cause me to feel ill. I wish this to stop. Plz feel better soon??? I need to get back to my normal ???active??? self quick.

DOR



Dear Cell Phone,

Why must you suck? I paid good money for you a year ago and you???re starting to make me think it was a giant mistake! Even though you make everyone whistle your ring tone upon hearing you. I did love you in the beginning, but I???m starting to think your dayz are numbered.

Yours truly,

DOR



Dear a Certain Someone,

I find you breathtaking??? Your beauty reaches me in a multitude of ways and has a means of grabbing hold of me and not letting go. Be forewarned. It does not lock me to your world. Tread lightly.

DOR



Dear Japanese,

I wish to learn how to understand you. Of any language I could learn, I think you would be best for me. I signed up for that beginner???s class and I???m hoping that you are fun and I learn something new. Here???s hoping!

Domo Arigato Gozaimasu

DOR



Hey Info Commercial,

I know my good friend H*l^n make???s a living off you. But I???m tired of seeing so many of you on when I???m looking for something good to watch at 3am in the morning when I get home from a night out. I know that some of you (The Magic Bullet, The little Giant Ladder, Tom Vu) kick some ass and are fun to watch and make me want to buy your product, but do you really need to be on 20+ channels. I???m sorry to be hatin??? on you. Really I am??? But it???s really how I feel!

DOR




Dear Soulstrut,

Thank you for being my favorite message board. I know I ignore you from time to time, but this is due to the fact that I get busy. I???m sorry you had to hear that from me. But buck up, your in my thoughts daily.

DOR
 

dear india,

it's been cool to check you out for 9 months and you got some sweet shit going on, but i must say i'm ready to break the fuck out. please do not kill me in the next 2 1/2 weeks so that i can get home and see my special lady friend, family, and dogs.

bluesnag


dear star wars,

please please please let your final episode not be a stinking pile of shit filled garbage. please just make it in the return of the jedi neighborhood of decency and i will not take a crap on you.

bluesnag


dear baby elephant i saw yesterday,

sorry that trainer guy was whacking you in the head. you sure were cute, but i know you could kill me if you wanted to. i'm pretty sure we'd be pretty good friends though if you got to know me.

bluesnag



dear letters to things and people thread,

thanks for blowing up. you are my favorite type of threads.

bluesnag



dear just enough money,

please stick around until my new job starts. i promise that i won't abuse you. i know you'd like some company, and i promise you'll have a little bit soon enough.

bluesnag
 
Dear Further adventures of Lord Quas,

how the hell did you go straight to the top 20 hip-hop charts in sweden? how does that work? that is crazy.

Ham
 
Dear HoggInTheFogg

You need some "twee" in your life, you're missing out.....big time.

Jaded Misanthrope
 
i know, i'm wondering though, can an admin/mod put some kinda funny name under my forum name...like 'Dickhead' or 'Gaylord' or something just as funny?..
no. but I had to ax your charming avatar. sorry.
 
Dear Further adventures of Lord Quas,

how the hell did you go straight to the top 20 hip-hop charts in sweden? how does that work? that is crazy.

Ham
Because it's Sweden. Next question.....
 
Dear (unnamed colleague),

I think you are an evil, narcissistic bitch that will grow old alone. As long as you continue to fuck people over, you will eventually reap what you have sown. I pray for you to realize what a truly manipulative, insecure, and satanic person you are, and that you will change your ways for your benefit. Your evil ways will curse you.

Sincerely,

Big Stacks from Kakalak
No way! My ex-girlfriend is one of your colleagues? Unreal....

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Dear Black Flag,
"Damaged" is the fuckin truth! Gotdamn!


Dear Skip James,
"Devil Got My Woman"
No words, only amazement. Thank You Sir.


Dear 10 lbs.,
Don't get too comfortable there pal. My leg's healin up quick & soon you'll be gone for good. Sorry, I'm sure you understand. Take it easy.


All you folls out in the world, doin the damn thing.
Much thanks and praise.


Dear Tall T & the Touchers,
"Touching the President" has oficially reached
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status in the mind garden. Thought you should know. Congrats!




 
Hey Iron Monkey,

Wow, you dated a woman like that? The person I wrote to is only a work colleague, so it's not that deep. If you dealt with such a person on a personal level, I really feel for you. Narcissists can be dangerous and destructive people. Do the names Blanche Taylor Moore and Velma Barfield ring a bell?

Peace,

Big Stacks from Kakalak