People With Weird Names

[soulmarcosa]

Real people from my past....

- Poor fat chick who never got called Elaine, just "Booger Girl"
- Mashawanda Crudup
- Sohrab Habibion ("So Rob, How Ya Bibion?")
- Mike Rakouskas (a new teacher doing roll call was always amusing with that one)
- Misty Ide (parents a bit too clever there)
- Star (actual boy's given name, parents had high expectations)
- Scooby (actual boy's given name, parents had low expectations)
- Punk girl whose given name was Rainbow but you'd never know it; she insisted on being called Mary or something like that.
- Two brothers with a father from Africa, both of whose names went along the lines of "Dr. K. Aal-Anubia." You called them "Doc" for short. One of them looked (and dressed) like "Beat It" era Michael Jackson. Their *full* names were something like "Dr. Kalsalamakaratamaka Aal-Anubia" except longer and more difficult to pronounce.

 

[The_Hook_Up]

I went to junior high with a girl named Sidona Cox. I aint crappin you negative. poor girl, what were her parents thinking?

 

[DCarfagna]

E***, your PMs are turned off and your e-mail got bounced back to me.
This is in regards to your "optimism."
Get at me via e-mail, which you can find here: www.ohiosoulrecordings.com

 

[neil_something]

ok, it's not a euphemism like most of the names mentioned, but it's pretty wierd (i used to issue passports so there were always plenty of wierd names):

European Peace Victory Stephens

i'm sure there were plenty of obscene ones too but i get them all confused in a mess of randy this and something beaver...

 

[grandpa_shig]

Eggbert

this is what my mom calls me. do we know each other? We called this kid from the hood Eggbert, 'cause he was doofy. I wouldn't call you doofy Mr. Shig.

I AINT NO DOOF

 

[batmon]

Eggbert

this is what my mom calls me. do we know each other? We called this kid from the hood Eggbert, 'cause he was doofy. I wouldn't call you doofy Mr. Shig.

I AINT NO DOOF

Like I said.

 

I can't think of many people with odd given names, but I can run down a list of some nicknames from work:

Jimmy Thumbs (has big-ass thumbs)

Jimmy Shaft (had a vasectomy)

Jew (has a jewish sounding last name, but isn't jewish)

Tommy Feta Cheese (he's greek)

Bald Anthony (he's bald)
Tony Broken Leg (broke his leg a few years ago)
Talkthony (doesn't shut up)

Montreal/Toronto/Couver (he's from Canada, you use whatever city you're in the mood for)

Hot Dog and Hamburger (two brothers, one's FAT and one's skinny)

Quiet Steve or McVeigh (rarely talks, looks like Tim McVeigh)

Head (huge head)

Fat Steve
Not So Fat Steve (two partners named Steve, one's fat as a house, the other one is 'husky')

Boston (guy who has been in the garage for over a year, no one on my side knows his name yet but he always wears a Boston Red Sox hat. We just started calling him Boston instead of learning his actual name)

Leno (has a HUGE chin)

Marley (from Jamaica)

Doofburger (this real doofy guy who limps)

and my personal favorite:

EDWARD SHITTERHANDS!!! (this guy was in the bathroom letting the globetrotters off the bus, and when he came out of the stall someone noticed that he didn't wash his hands. He's been called Edward Shitterhands ever since, usually shortened to Shithands. I don't even know his first name.)

 

[grandpa_shig]

^^dude, how is it that you got off with such a harmless nickname like sweendog?

fellers from the old neighborhood

one ear
sears
greg (dude's name was ryan, i just called him greg)
chopper
raul shariff muhanti
takuan
the bento bunch
MUDANG
hammy-ham
woody
maynardo de fresno
buddha-pet [RIP]
balki
bomba
captain gus
the lip
goon the mighty warrior
the food critic
harley bendino

 

^^dude, how is it that you got off with such a harmless nickname like sweendog?

In 8.5 years I've been called:

Stringbean
Chernobyl (I farted so bad one morning that it cleared half a room)
Scissorhands (cut a live cable by accident, wiping out service to a neighborhood... that name gets passed aorund to whoever fucked up last, currently held by Quiet Steve)
Nurse Sweeney (my first partner was a 65 year old)
Sag Fag (I was an extra in a Woody Allen movie and got into the Screen Actors Guild)

My friends have all been calling me Sweendog since high school, but it's been shortened to Sween over time. Not so fun to have "-dog" at the end of your name when you hit 30.

 

[Salary_Diz]

you forgot sweet dong longsicle!!!!

 

you forgot sweet dong longsicle!!!!

haha, those one's I listed were just from work. I've lost track of the sweendoglongisle remixes on here.

 

[BelgianWaffle]

-A girl named Lettuce (pronounced La Toose Ay)

 

[Pistol_Pete]

Chernobyl (I farted so bad one morning that it cleared half a room)

 

Hot Dog and Hamburger (two brothers, one's FAT and one's skinny)

Meet Hamburger...pictured here after our softball game last night eating a donut off of his beer bottle.

 

[Art_Form]

Mike Hunt
Richard Hertz
John Ouch (pronounced "OWWch")
Phuck Yu (Dave Chappelle)

 

[Mongo_Slade]

Mentioned in an article in today's NYT on PartyGaming.com's IPO:

Anurag Dikshit.

 

[Art_Form]

I can't believe no one said Dick Butkus!

 

[mylatency]

LOL

 

[mordecai]

Leonard Nimoy

 

[Art_Form]

If I would have taken my father's last name when I was born my name would have been "Juan Wood" (Juan would or One would)