Real World Strut (Advice Needed)

You don't owe the man a damn thing. But you do owe your wife and children the best future you can provide. Use that as your pole star and do what you think is best for them.
 
I would be interested in hearing your dad's reasons for you not buying the house and why it is important for him to have it instead of his grandchildren growing up in a family home that their great grandfather provided for them.
 
The_Hook_Up said:I would be interested in hearing your dad's reasons for you not buying the house and why it is important for him to have it instead of his grandchildren growing up in a family home that their great grandfather provided for them.




Like I said, he kind of has selfish motives and I don't see this situation as being any different. I do think he has some sentimental attachment to the house which I understand, but I don't understand why he wouldn't want me to have it to raise my family instead of some stranger. I think he's just holding on to some hope that if I don't buy it, he can talk my grandfather into letting him manage and take over the property.





The house does need quite a bit of work, but we have the cash to do it so that's not really an issue. We also realize that being a landlord is not a glamorous job, but like I said before, considering how expensive it is to live in the Bay Area let alone Berkeley, the rental income will be a huge plus.





My dad also told me that if we buy it that he'd like to be involved with helping out with the work and also perhaps living in the cottage someday. I don't see this happening given how unstable his work situation has been and the fact that we'll be relying on that rental income to help us out. I do believe, or at least hope, that if we do buy it he'll get over it eventually.
 
Possum Tom said:Buy it and sell it to your dad for a profit.




Actually not to far off from what I would do.





Tell your Dad that you understand his feelings and that you agree he should have first shot at buying it....he obviously can't afford it so you'll get to buy it by default and feel good that you didn't screw your dad no matter how big an asshole he is.
 
HarveyCanal said:Home ownership in this economy, especially in a still overpriced market such as the Bay Area, is IMO overrated.




Even if the market is overpriced right now (and being a Northeasterner I can't say), the mortgage rate will ultimately be a much bigger factor in your financial outlay. People tend to focus too much on the purchase price.





Right now rates are about as cheap as they have ever been, so if you are determined to buy, now is a good time. If your credit is good and you can put 20% down, you should have no problem getting a 5% mortgage, maybe better. The only way it will go down significantly in the future is if our economy collapses entirely.





Rent vs buy is a legitimate question, but it sounds like you have made your mind up.





As far as how to deal with your father, I think Rock has it right.
 
The other fucked up thing is that I had approached my dad about a year ago to see if he knew what my grandfather was planning on doing with the house. This was right after my grandma had passed away and I guess my grandpa told him and the family that he was planning on selling. My dad never said anything about him wanting it to be passed down to him and actually suggested I talk to my grandfather about the possibility of buying it. If he had been honest and upfront in the beginning I probably wouldn't have asked my grandfather in the first place.
 
definitely sit down with someone you trust to work out the numbers. all the real estate comes down to math and being aware of the maintenance and repairs needed. i wouldnt be fearful of renters (like frank and sportcas) but you DO have to prepare yourself for eventualities and go into the situation setting realistic terms with whoever you bring in. as long as you dont try to charge way too much, if you are fair and maybe even in a position to give a slight bargain, you will have plenty of people to be choose from. friends arent the best idea, but sometimes recommendations from friends are valuable. long story short, id say the rental situation is a positive, not a negative.





anyway, that didnt seem to be your concern.


you dont want him in the cottage tho. never a good idea to do business with anyone you have a spotty history with, especially relatives
 
jaymack said:soulstut advice pigpiiiiile!!!!!!!!!!


lmfao





yallz love to know everything




dude asked for advice/opinions...we gave ours. What is the hang up with that? I would like to add we did it without of the use of a "z" in lieu of proper word usage. We do indeed love to know things.
 
Your Dad probably has a mixture of regret and entitlement going on now, neither of which are appropriate, neither of which are your problem.


You benefit your aging grandfather here and your growing family - live the life you have in mind. Let your Dad be responsible for himself. Do it now.
 
The_Hook_Up said:jaymack said:soulstut advice pigpiiiiile!!!!!!!!!!


lmfao





yallz love to know everything




dude asked for advice/opinions...we gave ours. What is the hang up with that? I would like to add we did it without of the use of a "z" in lieu of proper word usage. We do indeed love to know things.




practically no one reads the schitt past the OP. i can tell. they just repeat the same advice the first 4 posters gave. suddenly the thread is 4 pages of the same advice.
 
jaymack said:The_Hook_Up said:jaymack said:soulstut advice pigpiiiiile!!!!!!!!!!


lmfao





yallz love to know everything




dude asked for advice/opinions...we gave ours. What is the hang up with that? I would like to add we did it without of the use of a "z" in lieu of proper word usage. We do indeed love to know things.




practically no one reads the schitt past the OP. i can tell. they just repeat the same advice the first 4 posters gave. suddenly the thread is 4 pages of the same advice.


just making jokes no big deal, dear abbys.
 
jaymack said:The_Hook_Up said:jaymack said:soulstut advice pigpiiiiile!!!!!!!!!!


lmfao





yallz love to know everything




dude asked for advice/opinions...we gave ours. What is the hang up with that? I would like to add we did it without of the use of a "z" in lieu of proper word usage. We do indeed love to know things.




practically no one reads the schitt past the OP. i can tell. they just repeat the same advice the first 4 posters gave. suddenly the thread is 4 pages of the same advice.




you poor fat retard
 
jaymack said:The_Hook_Up said:jaymack said:soulstut advice pigpiiiiile!!!!!!!!!!


lmfao





yallz love to know everything




dude asked for advice/opinions...we gave ours. What is the hang up with that? I would like to add we did it without of the use of a "z" in lieu of proper word usage. We do indeed love to know things.




practically no one reads the schitt past the OP. i can tell. they just repeat the same advice the first 4 posters gave. suddenly the thread is 4 pages of the same advice.




This, although it definitely helps give some peace of mind to the initial poster.